What I am Thankful for!

There are some days when my family just makes me want to scream, pull my hair, and cry all at the same time. Whether it is because my parents are disappointed in my grades, whether I didn't do a chore or two, or whether I am taking after my brother (the screw up) more when I should be taking after my sister more (the perfect one), even though I see the roles differently. Some days it is caused by my brother being a lazy bum and not doing anything around the house, or he's playing the over protective brother role too much. Then of course there is my sister who is two and a half hours away, I hardly see or talk to her, and when I do she plays the mother role more than the sister role. It seems like these incidents are the ones that always stand out the most, instead of the good ones.

Thankfully, though, I am able to look past all the annoyance, anger, and dislike and remember that my family is the absolute most important thing in my life, and the one thing I am MOST thankful for!

My parents have been not only my parents my whole life, but my best friends for the past 6 years. Living in a one bedroom and one bathroom hotel room with them for three months, you learn a lot and grow even closer, especially when they were the only people you had. They have been there for me through everything; the transition of moving and going to 3 schools in one year, my figure skating and all the ups and downs with that, school and the rigorous load I've put on myself every year, boyfriends and the horrible break ups and tears (which is when they take me for ice cream, buy me a stuffed animal, and make me breakfast), and last but certainly not least inappropriate issues and situations I was in. Yes friends are always nice to have in these situations, but my parents are better friends to me than most of my friends. If I did not have them during all of this I definitely would not have known what to do, or have pulled through as strongly as I did. They are my parents and my best friends and I am so thankful to have them. I know I am their baby and the idea of me going to college is hard, but I don't think that will break what we have.

Growing up as a child, and through most of my teenage life my sister was the next closes person to me. While she still is extremely close to me, it has not been the same since she got married and started a family of her own (which was to be expected). I still love her more than anything in the world and could never replace her. However since she lives so far away and has her family to worry about now, and my brother is living at home again, it just made sense that him and I would become so close some people think we are inseparable (which is kind of true). Our brother-sister relationship has grown into such a friendship it is almost scary. We went from always fighting and arguing growing up, to constantly going out to shop or get food, to even working at the ice rink together. He is always there for me to vent to about mom and dad, friends, school, boys, and work (even though it usually goes in one ear and out the other because he doesn't care, and thinks drama and high school "crap" is stupid). Even though he does ignore half of the stuff I say I know he really does care. When I got my hear crushed and broken in half he was right there with hugs, words of comfort, and then the famous phrase, "I'm gonna kill him!" He always knows the ring thing to say and/or do to make me smile again. I definitely know that after a past incident/situation I was in that he will ALWAYS be there for me. While my parents did their best nobody was there for me like my brother was. When all I could do was cry hysterically for an hour he sat there and held me. He brushed my tears away, made me smile, got me food and a soda, and stood by my side through the whole thing. I know that there are friends like that out there, but I don't want one of those friends because I have my brother. Him and I are very similar (even though my mom thinks it is a bad thing) therefore we enjoy the same things, and always have a good time and smile and laugh A LOT! I am so thankful to have him as my brother and other best friend!

My family truly is the most important part of my life, and I am so thankful and blessed to call them my family!!!

Girls, help or destruction?

I always wanted to know who in their right mind would chose/want to go to war. They know from the start that they will be leaving their family and loved ones behind, that they will be putting their own life in danger, and that they might be required to kill someone (whether it be on purpose or due to self defense). This is something that I have always known I would never be able to do. I could never willingly put my life, or the other soldiers' lives that I am with, in danger. That is why I respect soldiers very much and appreciate everything they do.

However I do know that if i were put in the situation as the soldiers in The Things They Carry I would definitely want to have someone back home. I would want that person to be there so I know I wasn't alone. That person would also be used as a reminder as to why I am where I am, and also to have something to look forward to. Knowing that you have someone back home waiting for you, I think, would cause you to be a little more cautious and responsible because you don't want to put yourself in a position where you won't be going home.

A few, if not the majority, of the soldiers had a woman that was in their life or that they talked about, at some point in the story. The only problem with having that woman in your life/on your mind, that a few of these men found out the hard way, is that they can cause more pain and destruction than one would think.

Take, for example, the incident with Kiowa and Jimmy Cross. As soon as Jimmy Cross pulled out the picture of his girlfriend everything went down hill. Now, in this case it could be completely coincidental , but it could also be the side affect (a.k.a. the destruction) of having a girl in your life as a soldier. Tim O'Brien even says, "In the field, though, the causes were immediate. A moment of carelessness a bad judgement or plain stupidity carried consequences that lasted forever" (177). That split second, when the girl was on his mind, was all that it took for something to go wrong. Is having a girl really worth all the destruction it could cause in the end?